If you've gotta tap the keg yourself to get a beer,asymmetry and eroticism it's not worth it. You may think it's worth it, but it's not.
As proof, we offer this footage from Brewery & Gasthof Zwanzger in Germany of a man attempting to tap a keg, his friends expectantly waiting for the job to be done so they can all pour themselves a nice pint.
Except that never ended up happening because the keg tapping went horribly, horribly wrong.
Our favorite part is the loud laughter that accompanies the breaking of the stein. As if that would be the only thing to go wrong.
Hope you had fun cleaning all that up.
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